So the summer months are gone, and with them went the Summer of Love. Gone are the days of sunny long dates in the park, strolling hand in hand by the riverside and lazy walks by the beach, warm rays smiling down at the dating couple beneath. The sun is now replaced with bitter frost, short days and chilly evenings. Wistful reminiscences of scantily clad women and shirtless men who immersed themselves in the dating game with confidence, are now just a whisper in your memory.
Winter months mean hibernation, comfort and rest; a time to retreat from the “peacock season” of summer. It’s a nostalgic time where lovers look back on their past relationships, perhaps with regret, singletons wish they had a lover to cuddle up to and couples make plans for Christmas. It is a time to reflect and also a time to look forward to the year ahead.
Don’t be conned by the winter blues, however. Unless you want to put your dating life on stall for several months in the year, the dating game must still go on. So gear up and follow these guidelines for a winter of dating wonder!
Although you may feel like staying in, there are plenty of fantastic places to go to for a winter date. Picture the two of you ice skating hand in hand as he gazes romantically into your eyes. Now if you’re anything like me, it’s really not particularly graceful (in fact, it’s full of bumps, crashes and bruises), but it can be heaps of fun. And what better way to break the ice on a first date (literally)!
If ice skating is not your bag, create opportunities for some alone time. Anything from having a hot cider in Winter Wonderland to pretending you’re tourists in the big city will cut it. Think outside the box and suggest something different. Embrace the festive season by creating an unconventional Christmas Day, just the two of you, away from family shenanigans and complications. Perhaps you can band together and do some voluntary work at a soup kitchen or homeless shelter.
To Gift or Not to Gift?
Gift giving can be a sensitive and tricky subject. How many of us have splashed the cash on a new boyfriend to receive nothing in return? And how many of us have received a gift and had to say that the gift we bought was ‘at home?’ It happens to the best of us. If you’ve been dating longer than just a month or two, you can prevent awkward gifting moments by having an open and honest discussion about expectations. Be frank and make a deal as to whether you will exchange something small or “go all out.” In essence, a great gift is spending quality time with a person. Presence is really the greatest present!
Meeting the Family
Christmas is a time for good old-fashioned family get-togethers. However, with that can come confusion over the “Introduction to Family” etiquette. If you have only been seeing your date for a few months or even weeks, there is no pressure to introduce him to ‘mad Aunt Clara’ or your whiskey loving Uncle Mark. Go at your own pace, or better still, the pace of the relationship and have an honest dialogue with your date about expectations. Don’t feel pressured to bring your date to your family Christmas meal because you reel at the thought of being seen as single again this Christmas. Accept where you are right now and be happy. There will be plenty of other Christmases.
Christmas can be a great time to really get close to your new fella without date expectations and stipulations. Dating in the holidays should be light and fun. It’s a time to cosy up and enjoy the festive season in each other’s company. Remember the biggest gift you can give your date at Christmas time is none other than YOU.
Daniella Blechner is a South London based Best-selling author of Mr Wrong. She is an author, teacher, healer and speaker who passionately uses her experiences to empower others. Mr Wrong, “a humorous and insightful exploration into why some women continually attract Mr Wrong and how to set out on a path to self-discovery,” is a collection of stories written by women across the world who have encountered and overcome “Mr Wrong” relationships. The aim is to unite, inspire and empower women to claim their stories and create a change within.Daniella runs workshop 7 Steps to Creating the Greatest Version of You as well as a six week course Unleash Your Voice working with women writers. She writes from the heart often laced with a wicked sense of humour. Daniella’s motto for life is Love. Life. Laugh. At the end of Life if asked, “Did you Love enough, Live enough and Laugh enough” the aim is to reply with an all resounding YES!!